I wrote this portion of my blog post before I decided to reactivate my Facebook account on August 6th 2013.
I deactivated my Facebook account on or about June 1st 2012. My reasoning was sound but not valiant. I had to escape that deep seething sting you feel when your ex posts all his/her shit about their new significant other and how happy they are. Tell me you don’t think they are going out of their way to let you know that they’ve achieved that all so elusive “happiness” that you could have never brought them. Fuck that. I don’t need a daily reminder that I suck. My middling bank account and empty bed keep me up to date on that little factoid just fine.
So I ran away, the only thing that made sense to me. I did have other motives as well. I don’t really feel the need to know about every little fucking thing that happens in everyone’s lives. OMG you ate lunch today! No one would have guessed! Thank you for letting me see what you will be shitting out later! There is such a thing as too much information and I felt that Facebook was letting us in on it. The days of Polaroid photos, jacking off to magazines, and phone calls on land-lines are over. Everything is digital these days and it chaps my ass. I wanted to try and fight the norm, maybe get back to some of the basics that we as human beings have overlooked because we are too busy over analyzing photos of someone’s weekend escapades.
That didn’t work. I immediately found another social media outlet for my obsession. Twitter – which in its defense is not as personal as Facebook. I can’t go onto twitter and see you’re whole life story and how great you think your life is. (Only celebrities and the immensely wealthy have “great” lives and they don’t really use Facebook) I still used that to stay connected to people I otherwise would not so it’s still kind of cheating. I also haven’t taken more photos or masturbated to a magazine so the whole notion of reconnecting to the basics may have been an epic fail.
I will counter that with the argument that my mental wellness did increase when I left Facebook. I didn’t feel quite as bad about myself as I did when barraged with constant reminders of my shortcomings. It also allowed me some time to focus inward, on improving myself in some ways. I began exercising more frequently and feel like physically I have never been in better shape. I started reading more, if you have ever finished an entire novel in a week; you know how enlightening it can be to lose yourself in another world.
I have not been without drawbacks regarding my release from the death grip Facebook had on my social life. Most of the friends I made in college only communicated through that medium so I have lost touch with that group of people. Someone also forgot to send me the memo that dictates that if something isn’t a Facebook event it won’t happen in real life or you’re not invited unless you are in it. Missed a few gatherings because of that one…I also haven’t had another girlfriend…I wonder if that has any correlation or if I’m just that jaded and narcissistic now.
I’m going to reactive my account and see how it feels to be apart of the largest social network in the world again. Fuck you Zuckerberg you sucked me back in.